Toilet of the Past's Future is an uncommon event in Death Road to Canada.
Event Text[]
The group discovers something incredible while exploring a house: An actual working toilet. Everyone has been doing their business in the woods.
The toilet has a futuristic control panel full of buttons. [Character] feels compelled to press one, and chooses the button labelled with a picture of:
- Jets of Water?
- Musical Notes
- Wings Flapping
- A Butt?
Results[]
Musical Notes[]
The toilet plays beautiful music. The music has no words, yet conveys a strong and haunting message of hope.
- [Party] +4 Morale
The future toilet emits a whirring noise and stops working.
Jets of Water?[]
The toilet sprays an enormous amount of water from a hidden bidet. This coats the room in water, but most of it hits [Character] right in the eyes.
- [Character] -1 Morale
The others are delighted by this!
- [Other Characters] +2 Morale
But wait! The bidet water was medicated and pleasantly scented! [Character]'s vision sharpens!
- [Character] +1 Shooting
The group is fully healed by the medicated bidet water!
- [Party] fully healed
The future toilet emits a whirring noise and stops working.
Wings Flapping[]
The toilet's lid opens and closes rapidly, with big WHOOMP sounds as the lid flings out gusts of air. The lid opens and closes about 30 times in a row, then stops. [Character] is confused by the purpose of this function.
- +30 Toilets opened
The future toilet emits a whirring noise and stops working.
A Butt?[]
The toilet starts to hum and glow slightly.
[Character] sits down. The electronic toilet gives them a powerful gluteal* message, as the toilet repeatedly chants in different languages:
THE GLUTES ARE THE KEY TO FITNESS
THE GLUTES ARE THE KEY TO STRENGTH
THE GLUTES ARE THE KEY TO POWER
THE GLUTES ARE THE CENTER OF LIFE
The future toilet emits a whirring noise and stops working.
*Vocabulary note: Gluteal means 'butt'